Children need praise and encouragement to help their motivation with general day-to-day tasks or especially when they are achieving new goals such as learning to walk or eating their vegetables. However, this does not mean that to motivate your child, you need to reward them each time they do something well.
Children become self-motivated when their natural curiosity is encouraged and supported and tend to do things simply because they enjoy doing them. Children who are self-motivated have better mental health and wellbeing than those who rely on being rewarded by others. It is important to be mindful that we can negatively influence and lower children’s motivation by making them feel they need a reward for everything they do.
When is it effective to praise?
Praise is most effective when it is specific and when parents/guardians are mindful of how and when they praise. When praising children, it is beneficial to focus on their efforts and achievements. Acknowledging the process of completing an activity or solving a problem helps them develop their sense of learning and motivational skills. Examples of specific praise are “You always put your toys away so nicely” or “good job for trying a new food”.
Praise should also be given based on a child’s age and stage of development as well as their individual ability. You might praise a young child for sharing their toys or for leaving the park when asked without any big behaviors. You might praise a teenager for coming home at an agreed time or for starting their homework without being asked or reminded.
What is the difference between Praise, Encouragement, and Rewards?
Praise is when you tell your child that you like what they are doing or how they are behaving. When using praise, you’re showing your child how to think and talk positively about themselves. You’re reinforcing your child’s self-esteem, and awareness of their positive choices.
Encouragement is praise for effort. Praising effort can motivate your child and encourage them to try hard in the future. You can also use encouragement before your child does something.
A reward is a consequence of positive behavior. Rather than verbal praise or encouragement, a reward is physical. For example, a reward could be a treat, a surprise, a special family activity, or an extra privilege.